Comments for Decision Quiz

Comment on Couple Dynamics: What to do When Your Spouse will not Listen to Reason. by LCastro

LCastro — Fri, 10 Feb 2012 06:01:14 +0000

This is so true. and I needed my thoughts sorted out. and as basic as it is; it was very hard to put my feelings into words. – and your last few paragraphs – worded it perfectly. Now, to think about it for a few days. and then pass along to my husband. – thank you.

Comment on Preventable Medicine for Skin Hunger – the Deprivation of Touch. by Relssorted

Relssorted — Tue, 05 Jul 2011 04:21:57 +0000

This is very interesting – I love a massage but never thought of how important it could be! Your quizzes look very interesting – would you be okay with me putting a link to this website on my website (above)? I’m a psychologist in Australia and am trying to launch a relationship survey that people can fill out so we can get an idea of things like where people meet, what girls and guys are looking for in a partner etc. Hoping to gauge some interest!

Comment on What Goes on During Repeated Relationship Breakups and Reconciliations? by Susan

Susan — Sat, 02 Jul 2011 17:22:45 +0000

What if the break-up(s) / separation(s) were due to depression / mid-life crisis experienced by one partner, with the other not knowing how to react / cope? This does not mean the end of love surely? What if one or both partners lacked the skills (or feared the outcomes) of communicating openly? What if “being clear” became synonymous with “being cruel”? Isn’t it the case that most people can learn to be compatible with another, and that it requires consistent work from both sides? Why do people give up so easily?

Comment on How Pornography can Damage Your Sex Life – or Not. by Dr. Bea

Dr. Bea — Mon, 28 Feb 2011 16:50:55 +0000

Growing up without a mom and dad would certainly be difficult and affect your relationships. Our early caretakers strongly influence the ability to be emotionally intimate with others so a deficit in loving affectionate contact and connection creates difficulties getting close to others in adult life. However, the brain is plastic and can develop the neural pathways for closeness that did not get developed in childhood. I recommend that you find a therapist to talk about these issues with. The therapist/client relationship is a type of intimacy. You can use this relationship to develop the experience of relating to a real person. This is the precursor to developing a sexual relationship and an on-going relationship with a woman.

Porn involves mostly the sense of sight and to some degree sound. You can also redevelop your senses of taste, touch, smell and hearing that you tend to shutout when you watch porn. When making love to a real person, all of the senses come into play and generate sexual arousal.

One client I worked with had similar issues, he had an abusive childhood and was neglected in his family. A couple of years after he had finished therapy he called me and told me he was in a new relationship that was very satisfying and much deeper than he had ever had before. He said he could not have handled the emotionally intimacy in the relationship without the work he and I had done together.

Comment on How Pornography can Damage Your Sex Life – or Not. by adan

adan — Tue, 22 Feb 2011 22:57:36 +0000

i totally agree with you ,let me just explain why some men like me enjoy porn
its because growing up without my dad and mom confidence is low and simply the body and mind both have their needs .the damage is hidden pornography and any man who experiences a woman before being exposed to porn is more likely to avoid porn because the feeling with being with a woman is more “real” and natural.what can someone who have addiction to porn really do ?
please advice if you have any
bless

Comment on Why Kids Fight. Understanding Triangulation in Relationships Pt. 3 by Jill

Jill — Sat, 15 Jan 2011 22:12:55 +0000

A very clear, insightful, well written article with helpful practical tips.

Comment on Communication Skill: Instant Replay by Kim Muzyka

Kim Muzyka — Tue, 08 Dec 2009 23:18:45 +0000

You’re an amazing woman – you make things so clear and relatively simple to accomplish. I appreciate your ‘gift’ of these publications which always help to ground me in some way. Thank You.

Comment on Why Kids Fight. Understanding Triangulation in Relationships Pt. 3 by Early Learning Toys

Early Learning Toys — Mon, 07 Dec 2009 18:31:58 +0000

A thoughtful insight and ideas I will use on my blog. You’ve obviously spent some time on this. Well done!

Comment on The Death of each Parent is a Life Experience by Janyse

Janyse — Sat, 22 Aug 2009 17:15:34 +0000

That is so true about connecting with your parents before they die. I recently decided to visit my parents and take the time to stay longer than I usually do because of work. My father is 93 and my mother is 87. I always felt closer to my father and in these last years because my grandfather died at 92 and (I was close to him) I could feel this anticipatory grief happening.
In the past couple of years I didn’t want to go to any celebrations, because I thought if I go then he will go and die and although it was irrational I realized I was fearing his death and feeling alone again.
So I took the time to spend a couple of weeks caretaking my parents fully. I have 6 siblings and for the first time I was alone with my parents. It was tiring work as my mother had a stroke, all on her left side, and there was much care to do. But as we settled into being with each other I began to see them just as two individuals. My father made a lot of jokes and made my mother laugh and my mother still told stories of how my father wasn’t living up to her expectations.Of course I would still oint out how he is now caretaking and he is now planting flowers tec. which he never did before. We laughed together and cried together. My dad and I cleaned the garage out and he told me how he always wanted the boys to help him , and here I was doing this with him. We went to Macdonalds and had french fries and coffee everyday after we went for groceries and spent time together, sometimes talking and sometimes just being quiet like being with my grandpa. My mom and I watched all the old romance shows on TV and cried together when someones heart was broken. And I cooked everything I could think of for them to make it good. We even went out for lunch in the handy dart and I took her and her wheel chair to Iga because she had not seen it for 14 years..And we went through all her cards she got from everyone, she had so many friends ( who of course have died) and she told stories about them.They all said what a great friend she was and she told me how great they were. And when it was time to go I didn’t want to leave them and they thanked me and said it was the best visit and I told them it meant the most to me to have them alone and be with them( even though I was tired.)I felt a new kind of connection
sort of like the connection I had when I was very little (safe) only now I was older and I could be able to help them and support them emotionally whereas when I was little I couldn’t.

I came back the next month for a few weeks and once again we resumed our visit and we all had a good time. and now I am back here and they are waiting for me to come back again. There is so much I learned about them and I realized so many things about life, getting older making things good, and realizing how important your parents are and that they are just plain people with limited tools, who have needs to be recognized and to be remembered for doing the best they could.

Comment on Methods For Changing Your Relationships by Save Relationship

Save Relationship — Thu, 16 Jul 2009 08:45:06 +0000

Sweet blog. I never know what I am going to come across next. I think you should do more posting as you have some pretty intelligent stuff to say.

I’ll be watching you .